Another day, another opportunity to please the Lord by exposing new Speaker Mike Johnson to the American people as the disturbed religious extremist creeper he is. And to do that, all you have to do is just find new examples of him opening his little Christian fascist mouth.
David Corn’s newsletter is a good starting place. From there we’ll take a light gander at Johnson’s drooling interview with Kayleigh McEnany on Fox News. You know, in case you wanted to watch two Aryan wackjob fundamentalist liars babble about Johnson starting every day in the Capitol’s “prayer room,” giant wanking motion dot gif.
Corn finds a strong record of Mike Johnson believing there should be an explicit religious test for politicians. He cites a 2019 seminar Johnson did with his wife Kelly — the “Christian counselor” whose practice sounds just as abusive as “Christian counseling” pretty much always is — where he said “biblical Christianity” is the only “valid worldview.” Fundamentalist fascist trolls love the phrase “biblical Christianity” because they think it makes them sound like they’ve studied the Bible harder than other, more studied theologians have, or that such ancient texts are really so easy to understand that even some idiot white hick from Bossier City, Louisiana, can interpret them.
Corn points to that recent Hannity interview Johnson did where he said: “I am a Bible-believing Christian. Someone asked me today in the media, they said, ‘It’s curious, people are curious: What does Mike Johnson think about any issue under the sun?’ I said, ‘Well, go pick up a Bible off your shelf and read it. That’s my worldview.'”
And if Mike Johnson’s Christian extremist reading of the Bible says God hates fags, then that’s just what it says! Why? Um, because he said so and he’s a white Christian man in a place of power. Duh! (One vile garbage bigot Southern Baptist mega-pastor we saw preach a number of times, Adrian Rogers, who is now dead, used to love to declare his interpretations of the Bible to be self-evidently true by saying, “It’s just black print on white paper!” Simple as that! Now stop asking the pastor questions and know your place, sinner.)
Corn reports that Johnson called at that seminar for a “biblically sanctioned government.” And here is the quote Corn found that really nailed down what Johnson meant by that:
“You better sit down any candidate who says they’re going to run for legislature and say, ‘I want to know what your worldview is. I want to know what, to know what you think about the Christian heritage of this country. I want to know what you think about God’s design for society. Have you even thought about that?’ If they hadn’t thought about it, you need to move on and find somebody who has…We have too many people in government who don’t know any of this stuff. They haven’t even thought about it.”
OK, Christian nationalist lunatic.
Hit Corn’s link for more, but now in this context, let’s look at something Mike Johnson told Kayleigh McEnany.
JOHNSON: I’m not trying to establish Christianity as the national religion or something, that is not what this is about at all. If you truly believe in the Bible’s commands and you seek to follow those, it is impossible to a hateful person. Because the greatest command in the Bible is that you love God with everything you have and you love your neighbor as you love yourself.
See? He can’t be hateful, because according to Mike Johnson’s Perfect Christian Worldview, Perfect Christians can’t by definition be hateful, because the Bible says right here that they can’t! Black print on white paper!
And if your wife’s “counseling practice” compares homosexuality to incest and bestiality and you spend your professional life trying to hurt LGBTQ+ people and criminalize homosexuality and claiming that marriage equality will lead to man-pet marriage and pedophile marriage, then those must just be more examples of God’s love!
If you actively worked to attack gay kids by partnering with the so-called “ex-gay” group Exodus International — now disbanded — to try to force kids to pray away the gay in widely discredited “conversion therapy”? Which literally doubles the risk of suicide attempts in LGB people who have undergone it?
Yeah, go fuck yourself in the cheap seats in hell, Mike.
We don’t have any desire to spend a bunch of time with the rest of the interview.
McEnany fawned all over the new speaker, in awe of the fact that Johnson (stupidly) “thinks God is leading the way” and that this is an “Esther-like moment.” She was so excited Johnson took her to the “prayer room” in the Capitol and that “he said he’s going to start every morning in prayer in that room.” Who gives a goddamn?
These deranged freaks really are impressed by the most transparently meaningless, performative, surface things, aren’t they? If you begin your day praying on your knees — first of all don’t blow your knees out praying like Mike Johnson’s wife does! — but if you begin your day on your knees and then proceed to treat your fellow man in ways that would make Jesus dick-kick you repeatedly like a money changer in the temple, then the morning prayers don’t mean much.
That’s who Mike Johnson is. His smug pronouncements that so-called Bible believers like himself can’t be hateful are part of the schtick.
Fundamentalist Christians love people like pedophiles love children.
Sorry My Wife Couldn’t Make It, She Blew Out Her Knees Praying: The Creepy Religious Extremism Of Speaker Mike Johnson
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